Generational Patterns

Many times, I have difficulty saying “no” to more work. For me, it is about wanting to help as many people as possible, and the deep-seated value that my parents instilled in me: “mientras haiga trabajo, aceptalo, no digas que no. Porque nunca sabes cuando no va ver.” And growing-up poor does this to us. Have you ever felt like you needed to do over-time? Like you couldn’t ask for a day off? 

It is these values that as a first-generation Xicana are sooo hard to shake off. Yes, I LOVE my job. Yes, I LOVE helping others, and at the same time, I notice when my body feels depleted, when I need a break, and when resentment starts to build along with the thoughts: “I have been working soo much. I am soo tried, I just need a small break to rest and re-energize my body & soul.” 

But it is sooo hard to ask for a day off. Isn’t it? So when I catch myself feeling tired, with low energy, and getting irritated at little things that happen, those are my warning signs that I need a break. And when I hear my parents’ voice in my head: “que break ni que nada, a trabajar!” I take a deep breath, connect with my body by doing a quick body scan, and think about the reasons why my parents immigrated to the US. 

We tend to forget why our parents came to this side of the border (USA). For us to have a better life, to not overwork ourselves. So what does your life look like? Feel like? Are you embodying their original dream-vision? Why is it soo hard to take time off to rest, to recuperate, to re-energize yourself? Next time this happens, remember your parents' dream-vision.

And allow yourself time to rest, to feel good, to enjoy the precious moments. Si, somxs trabajadorxs, y tambien merecemos tomar un Descanso, to take care of our well-being, in whatever way serves you best. Porque como dijo Audre Lorde: “Caring for Myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.”